15 Jul 2017

A Year Of Being Married.


It's mad to think that a year ago today, Ed and I were stood on the beautiful Amalfi coastline, dressed up all fancy, ready to declare our undying love for one another.

LOL, imagine me trying to squeeze into my wedding dress now, bump 'n' all.

Today is our 1st wedding anniversary. One year since what was undoubtedly the happiest and most memorable day of my life. 

And boy what a year it has been. A year with no dull moments. A year comprised of many ups and a few downs. A year of change and development.

Obviously the biggest development being the baby that's been cooking away in my womb for the last 8 months.

Yes, I did the cliche thing and got knocked up within months of tying the knot. It wasn't planned but after deciding 'hey, you're never truly ready' we quickly embraced the prospect of having a baby to love, and to be loved by.

That's not to say that the whole pregnancy/accepting what's to come malarky has been easy, because it hasn't been. It's been HARD. The phrase 'like a duck on water' springs to mind: I've appeared calm and collected on the surface but I've been paddling furiously underneath.

I've had my moments. Moments of extreme self-doubt about my ability to look after anything other than myself. Moments of uncontrollable sobbing for no reason other than shitty pregnancy hormones (I was inconsolable this one time after carelessly launching my pasta all over the living room floor). Moments where I couldn't even muster the energy to take on the simplest of tasks. What? Take my shoes off? CAN'T.

And it is in these moments that Ed has surpassed himself as a husband. He's been there with me every single hormonal-filled step of the way, proving what marriage is really about; taking the rough with the smooth and working through things as a team, sharing the weight of the problems equally.

I honestly cannot thank him enough. I can only hope to do the same for him, if and when he needs me most.

So today I sit here in bed, propped up by approx.1000 pillows, eating the breakfast Ed has lovingly cooked up for me (pancakes with bacon and maple syrup, in case you were wondering) smiling and feeling positive about the baby that is about to change our lives forever.

Because I know, as long as I have Ed by my side; making light of situations, (he's already mastered the cheesy Dad jokes), picking me up when I'm down and simply just being there, we will be fine.

No, we will be MORE than fine. We'll be great.

One year down, forever to go. I love you Ed. 


5 Jul 2017

Things You Should Never Say To Another Human Being


There are certain things, opinions and phrases that should never be voiced to another human being. They are unnecessary, can come across as rude and will almost always be taken the wrong way by the recipient.

Yet despite this, I can 100% guarantee that you’ve said most, if not all of these AND have had them said to you, on numerous occasions.

Humans are weird.

“You look tired”

Basically the polite way of saying “you look like crap”. This is my biggest pet peeve because it’s said to me ALL THE BLEEDIN' TIME (damn you, pesky eye bags).

Tired or not, I don't want to be told I look it ta very much.

“Are you alright? You look ill?”

So you wake up, you make a calculated decision to give your face a day off from make-up, a day to breathe. You feel free and fresh-faced. You ask yourself, why you not do this more?

I tell you why. Because as soon as you step foot in the office some smart arse is bound to come bumbling up to tell you that you look a bit peaky.

THANKS PAL.

So yeah, same principle as the above. You’re basically implying that someone looks god damn awful without knowing they feel it. Best not to say anything at all unless you know for sure that the person in question is feeling rough.

Actually scrap that, even if they are clearly under the weather the last thing they need is you saying that they look it.

“When are you having a baby/getting married.”

This is totally fine to say if you know the person and their lifestyle situation really, really well. If not, avoid asking this question, as you’ll more than likely piss them off.

This one is especially one not to say to a couple, as you may fuel an argument that has already caused a huge wedge between them. 

“Cheer up” or "smile"

If you're a victim of 'resting bitch face' like me then this one is very self explanatory. LEAVE ME ALONE FFS, THIS IS JUST MY FACE.

Also, even if I am a bit down, you telling me to cheer up is about as helpful as a chocolate teapot.

“No offense, but”

If you have to say this teeny little disclaimer before spewing out your opinion then you're 100% going to offend someone with it. Keep it to yourself, yeah?

“You’re nicer than I thought you would be.”

The biggest backhanded compliment known to man. Great, you like me...wait a minute, what exactly have people been saying about me behind my back? Why did you have this pre conceived idea that I was going to be some raging super bitch?

“That looks disgusting”

Another of my biggest pet hates. The beauty of going out to eat at a restaurant is that you can cater to your own tastes and order things that you like. Why people feel the need to comment on what you're about to tuck into is beyond me.

The worst is when someone makes a comparison between your food and something gross you definitely would not want to eat. I do not need nor want to know that you think my Stoganoff looks like a plate of mushed up dog food.

*sigh*

“You’re so quiet”

I'm an introvert with slight social anxiety so it's in my very nature (especially when flung into the middle of a big group) to be reserved and quiet. And although it's something I've come to accept over the years, there's still a big part of me that wishes I could change it.

I'm also very self-conscious about it, so when it'a pointed out I feel 10 times worse. In fact, I could end up agonising over that little throw away comment for hours.

*insert comment about someones weight*

Mentioning anyone's weight is never a good idea. Its a complete mine field - even when you think you're paying them a compliment it could backfire and you could end up hurting their feelings. It's wise not to say anything at all, unless they've commented first or made it blatantly obvious that they want your input.

A good alternative thing to say? "you're looking well."

What things do you think should be banned from coming out of peoples mouths?


29 Jun 2017

The Pregnancy Diaries || Less Than 10 Weeks To Go


As the title suggests, it's less than 10 weeks until D Day, aka my due date. It's actually 2 months today. And if that's not a scary thought, I dunno what is.

Now, please excuse me whilst I go scream into a pillow and discreetly shit myself. 

It's been a while since my last bump-date, a bit too long to be honest. My excuse? I don't have one. I just haven't felt like anything related to my pregnancy has been worthy of a share. I've not had any weird or wacky cravings, I've not had any unusual symptoms, or ANY symptoms really. I've just been plodding along as normal.

It was only a week or so ago that I really started to notice the toll pregnancy is taking on my body. My bump is quite impressive now - it feels as though I've got a bowling ball surgically attached to my torso - and it's making carrying out the most simplest of tasks; eating at a table, tying my shoelaces, even getting out of bed, a bit of a struggle. My poor lungs are really having to compete for space and even brisk walking leaves me huffing and puffing.

My energy levels are also crap, HELLO PREGNANCY FATIGUE, nice of you to swing by to haunt me again.

So yeah, physically I'm having to slow down. I should be embracing it - I mean it's basically a free pass to be lazy (and who wouldn't want that) but I'm finding it frustrating. I wanna be able do things, to get stuff done without feeling the urge to nap halfway through.

Mentally, I'm also struggling a bit. Lately my mood has resembled one of those zig zag lines you get on a heart monitor. It's very up and down but then I guess that's to be expected what with the fluctuating levels of hormones coursing through my veins.

However, today I'm feeling rather spritely and dare I say it, positive. I've got a couple of my best gals coming round shortly to discuss what I've learnt in yesterdays antenatal class, (why is everything to do with childbirth SO GROSS) eat nachos and play Mario Kart.

I can't bloody wait.

Until next time friends.


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