15 Jul 2017

A Year Of Being Married.

It's mad to think that a year ago today, Ed and I were stood on the beautiful Amalfi coastline, dressed up all fancy, ready to declare our undying love for one another.

LOL, imagine me trying to squeeze into my wedding dress now, bump 'n' all.

Today is our 1st wedding anniversary. One year since what was undoubtedly the happiest and most memorable day of my life. 

And boy what a year it has been. A year with no dull moments. A year comprised of many ups and a few downs. A year of change and development.

Obviously the biggest development being the baby that's been cooking away in my womb for the last 8 months.

Yes, I did the cliche thing and got knocked up within months of tying the knot. It wasn't planned but after deciding 'hey, you're never truly ready' we quickly embraced the prospect of having a baby to love, and to be loved by.

That's not to say that the whole pregnancy/accepting what's to come malarky has been easy, because it hasn't been. It's been HARD. The phrase 'like a duck on water' springs to mind: I've appeared calm and collected on the surface but I've been paddling furiously underneath.

I've had my moments. Moments of extreme self-doubt about my ability to look after anything other than myself. Moments of uncontrollable sobbing for no reason other than shitty pregnancy hormones (I was inconsolable this one time after carelessly launching my pasta all over the living room floor). Moments where I couldn't even muster the energy to take on the simplest of tasks. What? Take my shoes off? CAN'T.

And it is in these moments that Ed has surpassed himself as a husband. He's been there with me every single hormonal-filled step of the way, proving what marriage is really about; taking the rough with the smooth and working through things as a team, sharing the weight of the problems equally.

I honestly cannot thank him enough. I can only hope to do the same for him, if and when he needs me most.

So today I sit here in bed, propped up by approx.1000 pillows, eating the breakfast Ed has lovingly cooked up for me (pancakes with bacon and maple syrup, in case you were wondering) smiling and feeling positive about the baby that is about to change our lives forever.

Because I know, as long as I have Ed by my side; making light of situations, (he's already mastered the cheesy Dad jokes) picking me up when I'm down and simply just being there, we will be fine.

No, we will be MORE than fine. We'll be great.

One year down, forever to go. I love you Ed. 

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